Tag Archives: doom

Giant Peanut Monument


Listen up, Georgia. And listen good. This is the sort of thing that makes God angry. To wit:

Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;
— Exodus 20:4-6

Georgia… your WICKEDNESS at worshiping your GIANT FALSE PEANUT GOD will DOOM US ALL. Good people of Georgia, I implore you to RISE UP against this FALSE GOD and BURN IT TO THE GROUND, or we shall all SUFFER A THOUSAND PLAGUES. (I’m thinking that we’ll start off with bed bugs and work our way up to MERS.) It’s on your head, Georgia!